The "Overly Male Syndrome"

Reading of the actions of various Male politicians and other Men and Boys leads me readily into the slippery slopes of what I will call The Overly Male Syndrome.

There are at least several themes of how many of us Men are raised as boys which certainly might help lead us to be "different" from women in some pretty bad ways. I don't see a single, clear path as our experiences certainly vary. What doesn't differ is the propensity for certain characteristics which harm many others as well as often ourselves.

Some of these experiences we may face from babyhood on may include:

1. It's a tough world - so you've got to stand up for yourself and be independent and strong.

2. You've got to "be a man" - and be independent of and reject anything that is "feminine" - including your mother.

3. You are special because you are Male (and not Female).

As boys we have biological differences which affect us developmentally. Often we are slower than girls at developmental areas such as toilet training. Our play behavior from an early age is often very different from girls focused more on manipulating objects and less on cooperative play. While some of this may be related to our socialization, it also is affected by our biology as males. We have higher rates of things like autism, attention-deficit disorder and other areas which make learning in school problematic.

How we are treated by our parents, caregivers and others greatly affects how we end up as adults.

"It's a tough world..." type experiences may help us be independent as adults. They also help teach us to "defend our honor" and often to defy authority.

Rejecting the feminine - has various affects upon us including pressuring us to a narrow view of what is acceptable for ourselves as well as other men. Homophobia and violence directed at men because they aren't "real men" or women because they aren't male can come naturally out of this.

Our being "special" because we are Male and not Female affects us in many ways as adults. We can do things to women that we'd not imagine could or should be done to men and not see how inappropriate we are. These may go from not really listening to women to enslaving - buying women and even killing them.

The horrific things that we do to women - as men through rape, domestic violence, much childhood sexual abuse, stalking as well as verbally abusing partners, former partners, classmates/workmates and women and girls we don't even know are a "crime" or "continuing holocaust" in the best use of such words.

We also take what we learn out on other boys and men as children and later as adults. Many boys are brought up physically and psychologically abused by fathers, mothers and others who are feeding into the myths of what "being male" should be or is. While girls and women often internalize the hurt (and abuse themselves), we often lash out at others. We are the bullies or just the "rude men" (or worse).

We fight with other boys and men for "respect".

Many of us learn various dysfunctional ways of coping with our fears and anger. Many men live isolated lives emotionally in various ways.

My old friend Ed was a respectable math professor. He eventually married and had two beautiful daughters who are successful adults. Ed's life - looked sad to me over the many years that I knew him. I don't think that he had any "real friends", though he was certainly friendly to me and others.

Others superficially like Ed live often on the fringes of society, whether they are either "respectable" outwardly or "bums" or worse.

It is strange how the "newsmakers" in so many areas of catastrophic tragedies are male. The college and high school killers with their many guns are one example. The athlete or other celebrity who crashes their car at a high speed. The politicians like: NY's recent governor, Senator Craig, David Vitter - they're almost always male.

One thing that's sad about this is how unhappy so many of us men are with our lives. One would think with our privilege as men, we'd live long, happy lives. Often this doesn't seem to be the case.

Perhaps - eventually many more of us men will recognize that we have issues - that relate to how we are as men. If we realize this we may find it important first to develop meaningful relationships with other men that go beyond the "sports, women, booze" types of superficiality. When we begin to relate to other men, we may start learning to relate better to our children, parents and particularly with our significant others, whether female or male.

Thanks!

Obama and "The Experience Factor" ?

It is said by some that Obama "lacks the experience to be a good president".

It seems to me that if "experience" alone is the key factor, the Democrats have zero chance in the election.

It seems to me that the Democrats need to be able to emphasize the differences on the issues, which are many, to win the election.

I would hope that:

1.) Economic Policies - and the economy would help the Democrats,
2.) Support of Abortion rights - would help the Democrats,
3.) "The Conservative Philosophy" and "The Policies of Fear" - would scare a lot of Americans - feeling like McCain would be more of failed Bush policies,
4.) The Wars in Iraq and the threat of wars elsewhere as well as general foreign policy failures - would help the Democrats.

IF the Democrats, no matter who is nominated, can not get across that McCain is very Conservative and that Conservatism is NOT the best option in 2008, then they won't win.

It seems important in the coming months for the Democrats to:

1.) Energize the Democratic vote and move towards working together and
2.) Make efforts - that make "middle of the road" voters see Democrats as "middle of the road" and Republicans as "not middle of the road".

Statements such as Ms. F - certainly Hurt the efforts to make Democrats look middle of the road.

Democrats have a great opportunity. So far though it seems as though they are following history and taking defeat from the jaws of victory. I hope that it won't end up this way - where 4 more years of reactionary Supreme Court appointments take away Roe vs. Wade, our other rights continue to be eroded and our economy is run by the rich, for the rich.

Thanks!

Innocent Deaths

Eight Israelis were recently killed at a religious community in Israel. There was much outcry about innocent civilians.

Strangely when over 100 Gazan civilians including various children were killed by Israeli bombing this was "justifiable" and not a tragedy. Hamas's rockets had been shelling into Israel and in the past week one Israeli had been killed. There were seemingly no "innocent victims" here because "Hamas should have known that had they stopped their rockets, the killing wouldn't have occurred".

It is hard for me to understand how a people in Gaza and particularly children in Gaza are at fault for the misery that they've faced over the past 60 years. Given the poverty level and lack of land or resources to build an economy, is it any wonder that many people are radicalized.

The facts that many, many innocent Palestinians are killed by Israeli atrocities does not justify the killing of "innocent" Israelis. It does, however, make it more understandable.

The idea that "collective punishment" and fear of the killing of people or the destruction of their homes will somehow cow the people into "accepting reality" is a strange concept.

Similarly we may wonder why young males in our country who have been brutalized as children emotionally and physically by strict and arbitrary parents and/or bullied by other boys suddenly are killers. Passiveness may turn into aggressiveness most easily.

Thanks!

Taxation - Thinking about a Fairer System ???

Thinking about how we tax all of us in the US, I'm left with the feeling that:

1.) Those who work - and don't earn a huge amount often pay a lot of their income in taxes and
2.) Those - with substantial - "assets" - often appear to have ways of paying far less in taxes than they could easily afford to.

Thinking initially in these areas, I wonder why we don't tax: "assets" ?

Assume that Couple X owns:

1.) Two or more houses or condos or similar,
2.) A stock portfolio/ bonds/ bank accounts - with a value of $1-10 Million or more

vs. Couple Y who:

1.) Own a single residence (or rent) ,
2.) Have stock portfolio/bonds/bank accounts - with a value of $100,000 or significantly less.

Why shouldn't Couple X - have an exemption of some of their assets and pay taxes - on the remainder? Such a tax could be lessoned by (taxable) income that they received from the asset.

It often is stated that we should Not significantly tax capital gains or interest/dividend income because it will discourage investment and similar. I suppose that people can hid money under their mattresses and always there are incentives to look for the weaknesses in tax law to "save people money".

It seems that we should figure out ways to create as simple a tax system as possible which is progressive and requires people who have the ability to pay taxes to pay them, and those who have less of such an ability to pay significantly less.

I can't instantly construct a tax system to do what I am suggesting. I do think however that we should move towards more equity and fairness for all - and that such ideas could lead us on such a path.

Thanks!

Maleness - and Control of our lives

Recently I read an excellent, very lengthy biography of the noted British author Kingsley Amis. His life seemed dominated by his writing and his party life at least until he was around 50 years old. The party life seemed predicated upon his abilities to "score" with most any woman that he was attracted to. Into the early days of his second marriage, around age 50, his world was in many ways turned upside down. His new wife was greatly bothered because Kingsley was losing his abilities to "get it up".

It was interesting to see how this and general aging changed Amis. Clearly his masculinity was important to him and his lack of "potency" turned him around in his life. His wife didn't appreciate the new sort of "mother" role he sought with her. He lashed out in various ways with various people as his entitlement seemed no longer there.

As men we often feel that we have entitlements which we see as based upon "merit". We believe that we've paid our dues. We see ourselves as brighter than others. Traditionally we may have seen ourselves as physically stronger than others.

As we age and as we face what we perceive as challenges to our perceived power, we often react lashing outward at others we may love or simply at others. Women often seem to take out their hurts inwardly.

Learning of our own aging, our mortality and our being a part of larger worlds around us is important. The tip of my elbow has tendinitis which is mildly painful at times and not bothering me at others. It may simply not go away. As I move towards my 60's and beyond, such things may grow and gradually take over more and more of my essence. When younger I could pretend that I could control my body. Gradually my body teaches me the fallacy of such imaginations.

As men we need to learn more of how we are part of worlds around ourselves and not the Center of things. We need to feel the feelings and the being. We need to not see ourselves as powerless when we have power, nor All-Powerful, when we rarely are.

Thanks!

Looking at the Frontrunners for President

In looking at the candidates for president currently, I most notice the dramatic differences between the Republican and Democratic candidates. Looking at the websites can immediately provide images as well as detailed explanations of their "plans". Mitt Romney's "issues" area seems to immediately stress - defense and security issues. Barack Obama's website has issues in alphabetical order where "Civil Rights" comes first.

I've tried to choose below the issues of health care reform and abortion rights. One could easily look at many other issues. I wasn't able to find Obama's position on abortion, however I believe he supports Roe vs. Wade, which Clinton supports and the Republican candidates indicate they will work to overturn.

In my estimation one can debate within parties what is best. I would hope, perhaps naively, that one readily sees the differences between the Republicans and Democrats and that one's biases will push one strongly in one direction or the other.

What follows is copied and pasted from the websites themselves
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Romney: www.mittromney.com

Use A Free Market, Federalist Approach To Make Quality, Affordable Health Insurance Available To Every American

Deregulate State Markets. Encourage states to eliminate the cumbersome insurance regulations that drive costs up and providers out of the market.

Fix The Tax Code. Level the playing field by making all health care expenses tax deductible, eliminating the special treatment afforded employer-provided health plans.

Stop The Free-Riders. Use some of the money currently spent on providing expensive "free care" for the uninsured at emergency rooms to instead help the truly needy buy private insurance.

Reform The Medical Liability System. Institute federal caps on non-economic and punitive damage awards to eliminate frivolous lawsuits and bring an end to the practice of defensive medicine.

Promote Innovation In Medicaid. Give states flexibility to spend their Medicaid dollars in whatever way they find most efficient and effective.

Bring Health Care Into The 21st Century. Improve quality and enhance transparency by introducing the same competitive forces that drive innovation in other sectors of the economy.

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Promote A Culture Of Life. As President, Governor Romney will promote a culture of life. Governor Romney believes that Roe v. Wade should be overturned so that the issue of abortion can be returned to the American people and their elected representatives at the state and federal level.

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McCain: www.johnmccain.com

• Reform the tax code to eliminate the bias toward employer-sponsored health insurance, and provide all individuals with a $2,500 tax credit ($5,000 for families) to increase incentives for insurance coverage. Individuals owning innovative multi-year policies that cost less than the full credit can deposit remainder in expanded health savings accounts.
• Families should be able to purchase health insurance nationwide, across state lines, to maximize their choices, and heighten competition for their business that will eliminate excess overhead, administrative, and excessive compensation costs from the system.

• Insurance should be innovative, moving from job to home, job to job, and providing multi-year coverage.
• Require any state receiving Medicaid to develop a financial "risk adjustment" bonus to high-cost and low-income families to supplement tax credits and Medicaid funds.
• Allow individuals to get insurance through any organization or association that they choose: employers, individual purchases, churches, professional association, and so forth. These policies will be available to small businesses and the self-employed, will be portable across all jobs, and will automatically bridge the time between retirement and Medicare eligibility. These plans would have to meet rigorous standards and certification.
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Overturning Roe v. Wade John McCain believes Roe v. Wade is a flawed decision that must be overturned, and as president he will nominate judges who understand that courts should not be in the business of legislating from the bench. Constitutional balance would be restored by the reversal of Roe v. Wade, returning the abortion question to the individual states. The difficult issue of abortion should not be decided by judicial fiat.

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Clinton: www.hillaryclinton.com

Hillary's American Health Choices Plan covers all Americans and improves health care by lowering costs and improving quality. It speaks to American values, American families, and American jobs.

It puts the consumer in the driver's seat by offering more choices and lowering costs. If you're one of the tens of million Americans without coverage or if you don't like the coverage you have, you will have a choice of plans to pick from and that coverage will be affordable. Of course, if you like the plan you have, you can keep it.

• Affordable: Unlike the current health system where insurance premiums send people into bankruptcy, the plan provides tax credits for working families to help them cover their costs. The tax credits will ensure that working families never have to pay more than a limited percentage of their income for health care.
• Available: No discrimination. The insurance companies can't deny you coverage if you have a pre-existing condition.
• Reliable: It's portable. If you change or lose your job, you keep your health care.

If you have a plan you like, you keep it. If you want to change plans or aren't currently covered, you can choose from dozens of the same plans available to members of Congress, or you can opt into a public plan option like Medicare. And working families will get tax credits to help pay their premiums.

Small businesses are the engine of new job growth in the U.S. economy but face bigger challenges when it comes to providing health care for their employees. Hillary would give tax credits to small businesses that provide health care to their workers to help defray their coverage costs. This will make small businesses more competitive and help create good jobs with health benefits that will stay here in the US.

Insurance companies won't be able to deny you coverage or drop you because their computer model says you're not worth it. They will have to offer and renew coverage to anyone who applies and pays their premium. And like other things that you buy, they will have to compete for your business based on quality and price. Families will have the security of knowing that if they become ill or lose their jobs, they won't lose their coverage.

Nobody has worked harder or longer to improve health care than Hillary Clinton. From her time in Arkansas when she improved rural health care to her successful effort to create the SCHIP Children's Health Insurance program which now covers six million children, Hillary has the strength and experience to ensure that every man, woman and child in America has quality, affordable health care.

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When it comes to each woman's ability to make the most personal of life decisions, Hillary has stood firm as an advocate for a woman's right to choose.

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Obama: www.barackobama.com

• Obama's Plan to Cover Uninsured Americans: Obama will make available a new national health plan to all Americans, including the self-employed and small businesses, to buy affordable health coverage that is similar to the plan available to members of Congress. The Obama plan will have the following features:
1. Guaranteed eligibility. No American will be turned away from any insurance plan because of illness or pre-existing conditions.
2. Comprehensive benefits. The benefit package will be similar to that offered through Federal Employees Health Benefits Program (FEHBP), the plan members of Congress have. The plan will cover all essential medical services, including preventive, maternity and mental health care.
3. Affordable premiums, co-pays and deductibles.
4. Subsidies. Individuals and families who do not qualify for Medicaid or SCHIP but still need financial assistance will receive an income-related federal subsidy to buy into the new public plan or purchase a private health care plan.
5. Simplified paperwork and reined in health costs.
6. Easy enrollment. The new public plan will be simple to enroll in and provide ready access to coverage.
7. Portability and choice. Participants in the new public plan and the National Health Insurance Exchange (see below) will be able to move from job to job without changing or jeopardizing their health care coverage.
8. Quality and efficiency. Participating insurance companies in the new public program will be required to report data to ensure that standards for quality, health information technology and administration are being met.
• National Health Insurance Exchange: The Obama plan will create a National Health Insurance Exchange to help individuals who wish to purchase a private insurance plan. The Exchange will act as a watchdog group and help reform the private insurance market by creating rules and standards for participating insurance plans to ensure fairness and to make individual coverage more affordable and accessible. Insurers would have to issue every applicant a policy, and charge fair and stable premiums that will not depend upon health status. The Exchange will require that all the plans offered are at least as generous as the new public plan and have the same standards for quality and efficiency. The Exchange would evaluate plans and make the differences among the plans, including cost of services, public.
• Employer Contribution: Employers that do not offer or make a meaningful contribution to the cost of quality health coverage for their employees will be required to contribute a percentage of payroll toward the costs of the national plan. Small employers that meet certain revenue thresholds will be exempt.
• Mandatory Coverage of Children: Obama will require that all children have health care coverage. Obama will expand the number of options for young adults to get coverage, including allowing young people up to age 25 to continue coverage through their parents' plans.
• Expansion Of Medicaid and SCHIP: Obama will expand eligibility for the Medicaid and SCHIP programs and ensure that these programs continue to serve their critical safety net function.
• Flexibility for State Plans: Due to federal inaction, some states have taken the lead in health care reform. The Obama plan builds on these efforts and does not replace what states are doing. States can continue to experiment, provided they meet the minimum standards of the national plan.

Lower Costs by Modernizing The U.S. Health Care System

• Reducing Costs of Catastrophic Illnesses for Employers and Their Employees: Catastrophic health expenditures account for a high percentage of medical expenses for private insurers. The Obama plan would reimburse employer health plans for a portion of the catastrophic costs they incur above a threshold if they guarantee such savings are used to reduce the cost of workers' premiums.

Middle East Peace and President Bush

I sincerely believe that President Bush would like to see peace between the Israelis and Palestinians. I also don't believe that he has either an understanding or an acceptance of the realities that are necessary to make peace.

Currently there seems a continuation of past policies in that there are "boogeymen" who are "the problem" in the minds of the U.S. Government. It seems faintly possible that in a post-Bush administration this may change, though this would be a dramatic change if it went in directions that could bring about peace.

Iran seems to be "the demon" in the eyes of President Bush. It is unfortunate that in Iraq the Shiites had been "the most good guys" and that these Shiites closest ties outside of their own country were generally with Iran, a Shiite country, in the midst of a mostly Sunni Muslim world.

The Iranian leadership has been justifiably angry at the U.S. Administration. They had naively thought that they could be a major player in bringing peace within Iraq. They have not done much, if anything, to bring chaos/war in Iraq. They have primarily tried to help bring peace to Iraq.

This is not to say that the Iranian leadership are "good, honorable gentlemen" or similar. Clearly they have said some pretty nasty and naive things about Israel and Jews in general.

Iran is a major player, perhaps The Major Player in the Middle East besides Israel. We need to talk with the Iranian Government. The major Democratic presidential candidates and at least one Republican front runner have called for dialog with the Iranians - a definite change in policy - and an important, necessary change.

We need to talk and communicate with those who Don't Like Us! We don't need to like them, of course.

A second important party in the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict is Hamas. Hamas is in control of the Gaza strip in as much as the Israeli Government doesn't interfere with it. Hamas, like the Iranian leadership, is probably not a "good guy" of an organization. It is, however, an important participant, who can not be ignored (as it is being ignored) in any potential peace settlement.

The Sunni leadership of countries like Saudi Arabia, Jordan, Egypt as well as Pakistan and other Muslim countries can not afford to make Iran into "the enemy" as the U.S. Government attempts currently to do. While they may not publicly criticize Bush and his stands, there is a deep understanding among many that his peace proposals have little behind them and that a future administration is more likely to live in the realities of Iran (at least).

The U.S. and Israel may push all kinds of negotiations with the Fatah leadership of Mr. Abbas and his allies, but he can't make peace without at least some cooperation with Hamas. Hamas was the largest vote recipient in the last elections. Abbas currently is stuck - because if he gets the support of the U.S., he likely will be forced to compromise in his negotiations to a position that essentially "sells out his people" - which will result both in No Peace and in Hamas becoming the Sole viable force for Palestinians, hardly what the U.S. or Israel wants.

I hope for the best, but I'm not optimistic! I hope that I'm wrong. Thanks!

On Feminism - and Being Male

Being Male is something that I've had issues with since I was a boy. Feeling "different" being bullied by three boys two years older then me, being a loner and various other things isolated me from the worlds of: "country club cool boy", "stud", "star athlete", and other images I remember faintly from my distant youth.

Several days ago I read another rant of a long-time seeming activist to me saying that - many, many famous men and women have come from households without a father, and that "needing" a father is well over-rated. The tone and words that he wrote of strongly pushed a feeling that: "men are bad" and that "I don't identify with being a (real) man". (He's written similarly over the past 20 years.)

I agree that "needing a father" is not critical in being a healthy person. As children we need nurturing and love from adults - who may be of either gender and not necessarily simply our parents. I also recognize that the failures that I've had as both a son - feeling sad and angry thoughts related to my own father who died when I was 13 and more importantly as a father and now step-father are important to me. I believe that most men have issues related to their fathers, if they have them, as well as related to their children when we are fathers.

In the feminist male blogging community there are differing perspectives from one who works with young men and women both through teaching and his Christian youth groups (and generally says mostly quite insightful things), a young caring father, a blogger who speaks insightfully of being of Color and Male, and others who often write a lot about both what is bad about "maleness" and in some cases how they see us needing to do better as men to be the allies of women and more whole people.

Where there is a lack of what I think most important, it feels to me like it is a connection to other men in more than token numbers. Activists such as Steven Botkin, a most wonderful man, build community with men in important ways. They find male allies and talk through their issues and deal with their issues as men over many years, not relying primarily upon women for their emotional support and growth. They also build programs which work with men and deal with our issues relating to dominance and control in areas such as domestic violence and rape as well as working in areas where men are - such as being athletes. Such men confront men where they are at as both allies and men challenging their beliefs.

It is far, far easier to talk at men and talk with women. Seeking and getting the praise of many women is relatively easy when one can show that one is "different" from "those men". It is much, much harder to realize that while we as individuals may feel "different" - we are still men (primarily). For most women we are still different being male. For most men we are still one of them in important ways.

Men who work with men and connect with men can really be true allies and friends of women in ways that can be much harder absent such connections.

I was in my first men's group in about 1981, when I was 30 years old. Now I'm trying another time to connect and re-connect with men in my life. Several evenings ago after much effort four of us met in our first meeting as a men's support and consciousness raising group. I'm also working on an effort to have regular meetings with other men to do outreach work related to domestic violence and "our maleness" as part of a men's group that deals with domestic violence.

I've made my share of mistakes as a man in my life as many of us have. I'm ashamed of things that I've done and wish I had done better. I wish that more of my life as a single male and before I became a parent had had more of a focus towards helping others. Often it's easy to simply try to "have fun" and "fit in" and similar. One of the things I admire in many women is how they help others - their children, others' children, their parents, their closest friends and many more in their lives - reaching well beyond what is necessary.

As a man - I think it most important that we Do More rather than Say More! There are of course many other paths where we as Men can do good and help others. In speaking of working with men I don't want to sound like it's not equally important to work with children, the elderly, disabled people, in racism related areas and in many other important areas.

Thank you!

Moving Ahead - Trying to Leave the Ark

Today was an encouraging, though tiring day.

This morning I completed the paperwork for our claim with the City, besides the issue of how much money we feel that they should owe us. That we won't be able to figure out until at least this weekend, if then. In the early afternoon I filed the claim at City Hall.

The mechanical contractor and worker arrived putting in our new furnace. It is much calmer to have a furnace when it's 30-40 degrees, rather than a few space heaters. To be able to go to the bathroom and not freeze is no longer a luxury.

M - a most helpful and wonderful city employee - came through as promised with our dumpster -and all except a large carpet piece and about 10-15 bags of drywall and wood paneling made it into it before it was filled up. M told me the dumpster will be replaced with an empty one tomorrow morning and it can stay or be moved until all get their debris loaded. He also mentioned how he was working with others to try to ensure that now and in the future calamities will have coordinated, more efficient responses that will reach those who need assistance and where relevant get them to whatever city services can best help them.

I'm totally exhausted, but at least today got important things done. Thanks!

Noah's Ark - Almost the time when the Storm Began - a Week Ago

Yesterday I took off a few hours and played duplicate bridge. When my partner said: "that was stupid" or "why did you do that?" or similar - I was lost in feelings as to how playing a card or bidding something could matter - in the midst of what we've lost and what we're facing now.

I came home and began moving mostly sandbags from the back to near the curb. It was messy and exhausting. It also felt good to be accomplishing something and to be doing something that was necessary.

This morning after exercising I moved a few more things and then reached a point where I could only do more with the help of others. Fortunately the couple on the next block who had offered to help called me back responding to my message and came over immediately to help us.

After close to two hours of their help we'd taken most everything out of the back yard that needed to be moved to curbside as well as emptying our house and garage of that which we needed to let go of. Most heartbreaking perhaps was the trunk of '78s - from B's mother - soaked and soiled along with the trunk itself.

I feel a little cleansed - having gotten this done. We got a lot of work done this weekend. B and L - our friend who's visit with us - ended up being a rescue mission organized our upstairs so that it's livable and as good as we can make it. I bought a third new heater - in addition to the first two that they'd bought - so that all our bedrooms are warm - with no furnace. Hopefully Tuesday we'll have a functioning furnace. Hopefully late this week or thereabouts the work may begin to rebuild our downstairs' walls and tile the areas that previously had carpet.

The hard parts are the feelings and (financial and emotional) fears that we have individually and as partners. Walking in stores and in public - we are "different". We're lucky its what it is. I can't imagine the feeling of walking in public with non-visible terminal cancer or similar - feeling isolated from those around one.

It is hard to be a partnership now - to support each other - when we're each so raw and hurting inside and struggling to take care of our own feelings. B - asks me to - "fall apart in front of me" - instead of - keeping the rawness often invisible. That's hard for me - sometimes I have anger - that might be directed at her or the kids. I want to support her - but I fail at that often. I want to wake up - and have clear hope and just normalcy.

It will happen. It will take time. I don't want "sympathy cards" and similar. I appreciate the humor and love - from our new neighbors - K and D - who have been wonderfully supportive and loving through this - having just finished their remodeling of their new house - and suddenly struck with significant loss themselves (not as "bad" as ours, but significant).

Around the corner - was an elderly man - who's wife just died - and needs oxygen due to his poor health. His child has taken him in and his house - is empty and not cleaned up. V - two doors away - is 85 or 86 - in poor health and in shock at his loss. His children are trying to help him as best they can.

The sad part of all this is that the storm didn't cause the damage. Most of our City - had the same storm and little or no damage. A culvert - that was clogged with various materials - helped create a sort of dam - which made our creek a Lake. Other "failures" - related to maintenance of protective means being stripped away due to poor (or no) - work being done where it should have been done. It didn't have to be this way!! Hopefully the City will make necessary changes so it can't happen again.

Hopefully the dumpster we've been promised by a city employee - (he gave us all his card) will arrive (and shortly) and allow us to have our lost physical parts - taken away. Hopefully the city will pick up the sandbags - we have at least 75-100 of them - that have polluted creek water making them unhealthy to keep. Hopefully the huge, huge financial losses we've sustained will be mostly reimbursed - if they aren't (which could happen) - we will face incredible difficulties.

I hope that within a few months - our house will return to the clear image - shown from May, 2007 here - rather than how it looks now- in the other pictures here.

Most importantly - hopefully our hearts and souls will heal and grow - from this. Thank You!

Noah's Ark + 5

Rawness - seems the most apt word now.

Feeling like we're "sucker punched" in a moment, unalterably changed, wanting to move to what I'd call a: "simple normalcy". Our daily temperatures go up to around 43 degrees (F), with nights down around 32 - with no furnace until 95% certain sometime Tuesday (it's Saturday now) we'll have our new furnace and heat. The boys' rooms have space heaters and we have our living room fireplace evenings for warmth. Our bed heats us also.

We're not the "Poor People of the Lower Ninth Ward" - or similar. The main floor of our house wasn't damaged at all.

IF we are able to get the City to pay for most of the damage we will be solvent. IF not, we will have horrific debt for many years into the future.

Sunday late night and into Monday we got 5 inches of rainfall. Our house is on a creek. A culvert downstream - got completely jammed with trees and debris (it took 3 large truckloads of material to take it away during the late parts of our storm). It created a dam - which moved steadily upstream as water continued to poor down the stream. The city reacted very slowly at dealing with what was going on.

When the culvert was cleared, the floodwaters receded within an hour. We went from having 2 1/2 feet or a little more water throughout the lower level of our house and garage to seeing the water within its banks easily in that time.

In front of our house (the other side) a lake built up Monday morning that at its peak was about 200 feet long - the street entirely flooded and as it built up the water flowed down our driveway into our garage and then similarly across the street from us (they aren't on the creek at all) flooding their lower level and garage as well. So our floodwaters came from both directions as the storm sewers had no space due to the creek flood.

The pond upstream which was supposed to hold water and prevent flooding overflowed itself. A 96 inch emergency drain - directly to the Lake evidently wasn't opened or was clogged itself - so water couldn't drain, as it was supposed to, out to prevent the pond from overflowing.

Apparently water was held back from coming downstream as the storm built late Sunday night and then - the water "exploded" downstream - getting stopped by the culvert - creating a total mess.

The creek now is perhaps 8-10 feet wide and maybe 18 inches deep. The water level had to have come up at least 10-20 feet or more with what happened. The 10 foot width shifted behind our house to being around 100 feet wide and near us to at least 150 feet wide.

We are lucky in many ways, but it doesn't feel that way! We are middle class people who have access to resources. We don't have savings to cover our expenses, but we can access debt at least. We can speak and often others listen.

We appreciate the good feelings that others share with us! Our neighbors and beyond here have been wonderful! We have had mixed assistance and a lack thereof from the City and other authorities. FEMA has still not declared the harder hit areas a "disaster area" and we have no chance in that area until they are declared with whatever has to happen.

What we really need though is physical and emotional release - peace - normalcy - our lives back in one piece. When we have heat - that will be one step. When the work begins and then is completed to fix our house that will be another step. IF we get financial assistance eventually that will change things dramatically from having been HAMMERED and STUCK to simply having been hammered.

I'm hopeful! It's hard to support my partner when I'm hurting as I am. It's harder on her emotionally. She has other unrelated hurts on top of this - which makes it at least triply hard for her. I'm thankful. I'm hopeful. I'm crying inside and sad. Thanks!

Day 4 - After Noah's Gone

Feelings begin to flow in waves, No Longer in the - "I've got to do it phase", but despair at what we are in and have to look forward to in the coming days and weeks, joy - at how our neighbors have helped and been with us, fear of needing to pay off much new debt on top of our older obligations, hope that we can get the City to Pay for Much of our Expenses, Anger - that we have to face another difficult situation, and simply exhaustion - physically and mentally from all of this. Above are a mixture of today and Monday - it's cold in the house and it will be at least until Tuesday or more likely Wednesday - when we'll have a working furnace - It's Thursday now. I will learn and feel - what lessons I need from this. It's hard for my partner and our children. Life does and will move forward! Thanks!

Noah's Ark Revisited

Thankfully the waters are down! We had about 3 feet of water coming both from the creek in back as well as from the street in front of our house - Monday - was quite a day! Besides a new furnace, tearing out work to cut down on bacteria and similar from the creek and major repair work downstairs - many destroyed items, everything's just fine. I'm exhausted, but doing well given what we've been through. It's very, very hard on my partner!

Note: The pictures - first two are of the house and yard well before the flood. The third picture is of the downstairs after the waters receded and we'd stripped the carpet off. The fourth picture is of the toilet - after the waters went down - dirtied on the seat from the crud/water. The remaining pictures are of the front and back of the house as well as inside the garage, playroom and laundry room areas. Click on individual pictures to enlarge them to fill your page if you wish to see any images more closely. (Hopefully you won't face such a calamity in your life - ever! ) The lesson for us though is that material possessions aren't what matters most in our lives. Thanks!

Mike Huckabee - ? - His Own Words from his Website

Mike Huckabee seems to be the "rising star" in the 2008 Presidential Elections. I find it illuminating to read the words from his website. He certainly says some "good things". I do find what follows problematic! I find Huckabee scary - as Bush is - as a potential president.

Thanks! (the words below are directly copy and pasted from the website).

http://www.mikehuckabee.com/?FuseAction=Issues.Home

I support and have always supported passage of a constitutional amendment to protect the right to life. My convictions regarding the sanctity of life have always been clear and consistent, without equivocation or wavering. I believe that Roe v. Wade should be over-turned.

We don't need universal health care mandated by federal edict or funded through ever-higher taxes.

But I am running to completely eliminate all federal income and payroll taxes. And do I mean all - personal federal, corporate federal, gift, estate, capital gains, alternative minimum, Social Security, Medicare, self-employment.

The FairTax will replace the Internal Revenue Code with a consumption tax, like the taxes on retail sales forty-five states and the District of Columbia have now. All of us will get a monthly rebate that will reimburse us for taxes on purchases up to the poverty line, so that we're not taxed on necessities. That means people below the poverty line won't be taxed at all. We'll be taxed on what we decide to buy, not what we happen to earn. We won't be taxed on what we choose to save or the interest those savings earn. The tax will apply only to new goods, so we can reduce our taxes further by buying a used car or computer.

The FairTax will instantly make American products 12 to 25% more competitive because the cost of those goods will no longer be inflated by corporate taxes, costs of tax compliance, and Social Security matching payments.

I support and have always supported passage of a federal constitutional amendment that defines marriage as a union between one man and one woman. As President, I will fight for passage of this amendment. My personal belief is that marriage is between one man and one woman, for life.

Iraq is a battle in our generational, ideological war on terror. General Petraeus and our troops are giving their all to provide a window of opportunity for the Iraq government to succeed, while the Democrats are running for the exit doors.

· The Second Amendment is primarily about tyranny and self-defense, not hunting. The Founding Fathers wanted us to be
able to defend ourselves from our own government, if need be, and from all threats to our lives and property.

· Second Amendment rights belong to individuals, not cities or states. I oppose gun control based on geography.

· I consistently opposed banning assault weapons and opposed the Brady Bill.

· As Governor, I protected gun manufacturers from frivolous law suits.

· I was the first Governor in the country to have a concealed handgun license.

Paternity - Fathers - and Sperm Donors ?

"Melville, N.Y. - A New York man who said he donated sperm to a female co-worker as a friendly gesture and sent presents and cards to the child over the years likely will owe child support for the college-bound teenager, according to a judge's ruling" - Sophia Chang, Newsday, p.A5, Seattle Times, December 1, 2007.

The article is somewhat confusing, hence some of my thoughts on this matter could be rendered "wrong" if I'm misunderstanding unstated things in the case.

A. "the man's interactions with the child over the years had a patriarchal nature" -per the legal representative of the mother,
B. Per the man - he donated sperm after learning that his co-worker and her (female) partner wanted to have a baby - and her son was born July 26, 1989
C. "The man, married at the time, agreed he would not have any rights or benefits in rearing the child, but the oral agreement never was put in writing..."
D. "But he took the unusual step of allowing his name to appear on the child's birth certificate because he thought it was in the child's "best interests that he would have an identity when he grew older..." (per the man).
E. Before the child's family moved in 1993 to Oregon the man had contact with the child.
F. The man sent the boy money, gifts and cards and letters signed "Dad" or "Daddy".
G. The man spoke to the boy approximately 7 times over the past 15 years.
H. The child has signed an affidavit stating that the man is the only father he's known.
I. Per the mother's attorney: "The fact of the matter is that he held himself out as the child's father for 18 years until he asked for DNA testing."

I have some problems with the conclusion of child support being owed based upon the accuracy (if so) of the statements above.

A. I see nothing of the allegations of the mother - related to the accuracy of the statements of the man and presume that these facts have not been contested. (IF there are discrepancies, one would need to interpret the credence of the conflicting statements).
B. It would appear to me that the man's name on the birth certificate is problematic. IF it could, for example, allow him to carry the boy on his health insurance through work, or otherwise give him rights as the man's child, responsibilities as "the father" would certainly apply. Otherwise there would appear to either be a potential issue of either fraud or the man claiming rights, but not responsibilities.
C. I do not find the issues of the contact that the man had with the boy in itself as establishing "paternity" or being "the father". Assume, for example, that the man had met the mother while she was pregnant and then lived with her for a period of time - where he was "the father" to the child and others. He would be a "step-father", not "father" in legal terms in such a situation most logically. Adoption or other legal actions might establish parental rights and obligations.
D. I find it important to distinguish between the: "deadbeat father" - who is the biological father of a child and would thereby have potential parental responsibilities and in some cases rights and a man or woman who is involved in the life of a child "as a parent". Such a situation might be problematic in the situation described above related to parental rights of the "second mother" in the event of a split between she and the birth mother. I do not see situation of the birth mother's life partner as similar to the situation of this man.
E. It is troubling to me absent other clear extenuating circumstances as to why this man should suddenly be liable for child support, when he had no seeming rights or responsibilities as the child's "father" for the first 18 years of the boy's life. IF he was the "biological father" as opposed to "sperm donor" I could see the right of the mother to demand financial support.

Perhaps I'm missing something here! Thanks!

Moaning and Groaning or Being Thankful

Many of us have lot to be thankful for. Often the hard things in our lives seem to take over in our heads and we take much for granted. I'm generally aware of how good I have it.

Today in the health club I talked at length with a young man I first met close to a year ago, his first day in the club after his accident. 1400 pounds had crushed one foot and he was tentative and slow moving onto equipment from his scooter. Gradually he used the scooter less and less and by last summer he was walking without the scooter to work out and while working out.

Then I didn't see him for a few months. He was back with his foot in a cast, having had a setback with more surgery. Today he told me a lot which really made me think. His doctor had told him that with the removal of the pins from his surgery he'd be walking in 2-4 weeks. A month later the doctor told him that he was sorry, but it would be four more months before he could walk.

Yes, he has few choices, but he's really trying, not knowing if he'll ever be free of pain, but hoping to be able to walk.

A high school classmate just finished a year of cancer treatments that greatly weakened her. Her energy is back and she thinks that she's succeeded, but one can't know. This isn't the first time such cancer has threatened her life.

I live in the most wonderful house I've ever lived in in my life. I've succeeded in retiring at age 55 and have the time to do some things I've wanted to do for many years. I have a loving partner and family.

My body isn't as pain free as it was a few years ago and won't let me do some things that mean a lot to me. I'm lucky in so many ways to be healthy and free to live a life with a lot of choices.

Thanks!

The Shadow Side of Maleness

Shlomo Carlebach was a charismatic "singing rabbi" who had a large following among some Orthodox Jews such as my brother. Particularly after his death, various women discovered that they were not alone in having been seduced by him during his travels (which was clearly outside of bounds for his purported religious beliefs).

Within the Pro-Feminist Men's Movement some years ago a well known musician and leader was outed in a similar way.

Among "liberal" (and not quite as "liberal") male politicians such as Senators Ted Kennedy, Robert Packwood and Daniel Inouye (see:http://www.answers.com/topic/sexual-harassment) issues of sexual harassment seem to arise fairly regularly.

It seems as though our male drive towards power and recognition seems to correlate for far too many of us with a need for either female (sexual based) approval or for power over individual women (through harassment).

I would think that particularly amongst male leaders of the left that some of them would find much more inner peace as well as more effective long-term (inner based) success (as well as ethical "goodness"), if they were more grounded in their sexual and general personal identities. I would hope that a rooted, deeply ingrained Feminist consciousness might help some of these men.

Thanks!

Going Against The Norms - Significant or Not ?

As a teenager in the mid-1960's I used to walk around West Lafayette, Indiana, USA - where I grew up - particularly on Purdue University's campus barefoot. This was being "different" in a way that really had little significance for me or others.

In the summer of 1969 or 1970 - playing the French Horn in the Lafayette Citizen's Band - I bucked "the rules" and wore a Non-White dress shirt with my tie at one of our regular Sunday afternoon concerts. Why one couldn't wear a modest yellow or blue shirt - was "tradition" I guess - in those days - White was "the norm". Soon other boys (though not the older men) were sometimes wearing non-White shirts. Did this matter? Not much then I guess!

In 1976 I convinced my partner of the time to keep her "maiden name" when we married (in early 1977). Women in Chicago didn't do that then very frequently. I think that this was helpful for both of us and am glad I saw things as I did, though I didn't formally discover Feminism until around 1981.

Somewhere around 1977 or 1978 while working at the Chicago North Social Security Office - in a world where smoking was allowed most everywhere, I put a sign at my desk saying to claimants and co-workers - "No Smoking" (at my desk). Surprisingly I got a lot of respect from both claimants and co-workers who smoked everywhere else most of the time.

In 1987 my son Ben was born carrying his mother's surname as his last name - allowing her family name to move into another generation - which it wouldn't otherwise do. My son is my son - his last name - isn't something that belongs to me because I am male.

My father spoke out against the War in Vietnam to family at least as early as August, 1962 - he died in November, 1964 - before US troops escalated their efforts in 1965 (after President Johnson faked the Gulf of Tonkin "incident" to justify a massive war effort).

I grew up without television - my father's choice to ensure that we'd read a lot not allowed to have any kind of guns - including squirt guns - because they were guns.

Thinking independently - can be helpful - particularly when working through things in good ways. Sometimes it may be frivolous - other times more significant!

Thanks!

Pacific Northwest "Humor"

The Pacific Northwest is heavily influenced by very White - Norwegian (and neighboring) folks whose humor is "different" (particularly to that of my Black Partner).

Saturday - at Arco Gas Station - a deafening car stereo (fairly unusual here - usually in a car of an 18 year old White Boy - with an ancient junk car) - booms at all of us there. Late 40'sish White Man says to me: "It's after 5:00 p.m. so I can't turn up Prairie Home Companion" (it goes off the air at 5:00 p.m.) - and we both laugh! (Not funny to my partner!)

Thanks!

Iran-ing It

Reading an excellently recently written writing of Seymour Hersh in the New Yorker about Iran and Iraq was most informative! He believes that the - "scare them about the Nuclear Threat" - strategy related to Iran has failed with the USian public. Now, he indicates there is an effort to convince us "uninformed folks" that there is a great terrorist threat - Al Quaida - based coming from Iran.

Hersh points out the internal contradictions in current U.S. policy and how so much is trying to get the political spin right (what else is new!). Supporting the Iraqi Government is supporting Shiite leadership which is allied (somewhat at least) with Iraq. Iranians have strong economic and religious ties to Iraq - going to shrines in Iraq, etc. - based to a significant degree on the facts that Iran is a Shiite country and Iraq's largest population is also Shiite.

We are also pushing the supposed success of alliances with Sunni forces outside of the Shiite Areas of Iraq. Purportedly we are getting these forces to turn against Al Quaida. The problem with this is that - much of the end result is - ethnic cleansing - of Shiites from Sunni areas and vice versa.

We are pushing supposedly for a unified government and a single country remaining, while our actions in many ways may lead towards partition into 3 separate countries.

From Hersh's picture, which seems well thought out and researched, it seems obvious that US policy remains confused and not thought out, as it has always been in Iraq. One can only hope that "the politicians" - will heed the warnings and help prevent Bush, Cheney, etc. - from attacking Iran before the 2008 Election.

Thanks!

Why ?

Why
Do I
Hurt the One
I Love - So Much?

with Excuses
and sometimes
No Excuses

Previously
I had feelings
of Anomie
Resentment
or similar

Excuses -
More Excuses

Now - I've
No Idea
Why
---
I'm hurting
physically
but Why
should that translate
to being Insensitive
and Lost
in the Moment

I Hope
I'll do
Not Only
Better,
..... but

Much Better
so - I won't
Need to say
these words
again
-g-
10/12/2007

Goodbye B-mer - Hi Little Wagon!

This morning was farewell to our '98 BMW and welcome to our new 2008 Toyota Matrix. We needed better Rojo (dog) space, and the B'mer - was having far too many - little - not-so-little expenses. I'm happy to have a much smaller and less powerful car - much simpler - more at my level. I'm not happy at all our debt!

I never liked the B'mer, though at times it was convenient. I always felt like I didn't belong in it - having trouble parking it at times, feeling - like I belonged in a smaller, simpler vehicle. The B'mer designers seems like idiots! They spend so much money on their engines and similar - which makes the car ride very nicely and rapidly. They scrimp so, so much on cup holders and similar - which are cheap and for us caused numerous spills in the car. It seems so silly - that they can't take care of the "little things" which cost relatively little.

Before yesterday there was plenty of back-and-forth - until my partner finally agreed reluctantly that such a small, for her unattractive, type of car was the best alternative that I would agree with - for the vehicle that I drive 90+% of the time. It felt good that I could have my priority respected!

Thanks!

Confronting our Privilige

Several months ago an 86 year old area character in the subdivision I live in shocked me when I stopped to tell him about our new neighbors-to-be. His first question was "Are They White?" Given that my partner is Black, I like to think I'm a little sensitive and aware related to issues of race and tolerance.

Then he commented on how beautiful my (Black) car is using the "N" word twice in extremely racist ways. I ended the conversation immediately and left - stunned. I told my partner later what happened and she asked me about Confronting his Racism. I lamely said that he, an 86 year old wouldn't change.

The next morning I confronted the man. (I realized that my passivity was part of the problem!) Bob didn't know that my partner is Black - obviously! He apologized. I've never talked with him directly since then by choice though I see him all the time. IF his words of apology or actions thereafter had indicated a desire to share and talk and change it would be different for me. I don't want to tacitly support his racism.

My natural reaction to areas like this that bother me a lot is to think and "care", but not really to do much to change things.

In the 1960's as "Black Power" gained strength and "Civil Rights" became less common, we White Folks were told over-and-over again that it was time for us to begin the serious work of ending Racism in the White Communities of the U.S. It was time to let Black People lead their Movement and for we, the "bad people", to make serious change where it needed to be made.

To a large degree we've never done our job and racism continues to this day largely as a result of this.

We may be "liberal" and thereby "aware". We tend, however, not to translate our purported insights to action.

Racism may be the best example of this however it also applies in other areas. We men don't work with other men to end sexism. In a slightly different way We who oppose the War in Iraq don't really seriously work to end the War.

Thanks!

Presumptions and "Our Interests"

In approximately 1960-1961, at the age of about 9-10, I remember being in a march around the County Courthouse in Lafayette, Indiana protesting some atrocity against Blacks in the Deep South. There weren't that many of us and others out shopping stared at us, most likely never having seen a demonstration before.

The word "atrocity" - above clearly shows my prejudiced perspective. Social justice, non-violence, and liberal-radical political perspectives have always shaped my essence.

In other households in the U.S. - "God" - and through one's vision religion may similarly shape views which may range from radical social activists to fundamentalist families where the word of The Father is supreme.

If I wish to understand and talk with those whose perspectives are radically different from mine I need to listen very carefully and seek a common ground which may be difficult to find.

Apart from differences in perspective often our ideologies color our vision and sometimes lead us astray. It is simple to look at how Bush Administration figures totally misread Iraq before and shortly after The U.S. invaded to "liberate" it. It is harder though to look at how we speak out and turn others against the causes we believe in Not recognizing how our words do the opposite of what we wish them to do at times.

As men we often don't learn to listen to women. As (often White) Americans we make presumptions about both others abroad and minorities within our countries.

In 2004 my partner and I were in London and Italy not long before the November elections. It was fascinating to see worlds where English language television talked about American politics (including CNN) - in fairly open, diverse ways, not stuck in the polarization and limited perspectives we see in the U.S.

I hope that I will find better ways over the rest of my life in working for change in areas such as: Male - violence, Racism, as well as building World Peace - including Palestine, Iraq, Iran, North Korea and beyond.

Thanks!

Respect - and a World Leader

In reading of the controversial appearance of the Iranian leader at Columbia University yesterday I find it difficult to accept the "introduction" that Columbia University's President gave before the Iranian leader was allowed to speak.

I need not have any appreciation of the Iranian leader to feel like an introduction of him as a speaker should show some basic respect for him. I think it important to distinguish between respecting one invited to speak before one and questioning such a person - seeking answers to specific questions.

In the 1980's I went to see Louis Farrakhan speak at the University of Wisconsin, Madison. Hearing him speak was an "education" and very helpful for me. I clearly heard him as a charismatic - indeed spellbinding speaker who was very intelligent. He seemed quite rational and on target in many ways. Unfortunately Anti-Semitism - was dominant in his thoughts and intervened regularly as Blaming Jews - being totally irrational and indeed crazy in this area - got in the way of most everything he spoke of.

Listening to Farrakhan - it was clear that he had the "surface" support of many, predominantly poorer Black people, but was hardly a political force to be reckoned with. Understandably many, particularly Jews, thought him a serious threat.

Hearing Farrakhan helped me understand a lot! Not having an opportunity to hear him would have denied others and me a good opportunity to learn various things.

I think that it is a good idea to listen to others whose ideas we may find distasteful! It is important to "protect" ourselves from threats to our being. It is unclear to me how we can not both take seriously any potential threats from countries such as Iran, while listening and respecting someone such as this man who was invited to speak at Columbia University.

Clearly - when he said that there were no Gay/Lesbian people in Iran, we have a right to react to his words. Respecting him as a person need not mean that we find his words accurate or always respecting others or ourselves.

It was sad when Senator Obama was ridiculed for saying that he would meet with "enemy" leaders if asked to do so by them in his first year as President of the U.S. Meeting with "the enemy" is a good idea! We all can learn from our "enemies". In some cases we can break down barriers that separate us. If they truly are "bad", we should have enough respect for ourselves and our leaders to feel that our leaders could see through attempts to mislead us.

Talking and listening is important! Silencing others doesn't work. Iran's leader evidently has a lot of respect because he will stand up to President Bush/The U.S. and speak out against Israel.

It would be nice if we could honestly work in the U.S. both to create a just peace in Palestine/Israel/Gaza and more generally to have a lot more respect in The Arab World as well as in many other countries.

I am sad and angered! Thanks!

National Health Insurance - Again

I heard Richard Viguerie, a right wing figure, speaking of the weaknesses of the Democratic proposals for National Health Insurance in the US. His framing of the problem was telling. He indicated the necessity of creating disincentives (and incentives) for "younger, healthier people" getting more than the cheapest possible health insurance to counter the costs of the more expensive, more comprehensive policies being held solely by presumably: "older, less healthy people".

A good example of this type of pricing differential is visible on the OPM Federal Employees' benefits website ( http://www.opm.gov/insure/health/08rates/2008non_postal_ffs.pdf ) where employees and retirees in 2008 will pay their portions of Higher Option Blue Cross - $314.47/month and GEHA - $401.79/month vs. some lower costs plans that are $163.85 and $189.37/month.

Employees and retirees with high medical needs will likely pay the higher premium plans which have better benefits, while those with perceived lower medical needs will use lower cost plans.

I know as a Man and as a Human Being that I don't look at things and say to myself: "Well, someday I'm likely to have a stroke or get cancer so I should enroll in a most comprehensive health plan Now to cover that possibility."

I also know that when one has a family and one's baby is born with serious complications and lifelong disabilities, one's life is turned upside down. When one develops diabetes or has a stroke (in one's 40's for example) or similar one has a totally different outlook upon medical care. What also is the young adult to do who works hard despite having serious diabetes issues or other medical needs that cost a lot of money.

I am "socialist" in the sense that I believe that medical care is a right! Unless we all share the costs of those whose medical needs are high, we create a system of "haves" and "haves not" totally separate from issues of our socioeconomic class.

In creating a viable National Health Care System we need some important features:

1.) All are covered
2.) The costs both for coverage and for out-of-pocket expenses take into consideration normal incomes and savings. (One can't expect someone with an income of $50,000/year - to pay 25% of their income on medical care - unless they have very large savings perhaps.)
3.) Provisions need to take care of the needs of lower income people,
4.) Cost containment provisions need to be in place that cut the paperwork costs and really help control costs, rather than simply squeezing middle and lower class USians financially.

Tax incentives as most Republicans propose will work logically for those with high incomes, but not for those who lack a high income.

Choice is a good idea, but choice alone - "the free market" - doesn't make health insurance affordable. Health insurance is not "competitive" in important ways.

Thanks!

"Socialism" and National Health Insurance - in the US

Hillary Clinton proposed her ideas for a national health plan today. She was clear to avoid anything that might create a "bureaucracy" or be a single-payer-plan, having learned that "socialism" is not appealing to many in the U.S. Her plan will require all to have coverage, employers to pay towards health coverage (in ways that are unclear to me now), and subsidies for low income people.

Per 2006 US Census data, the median family income for a family of four in 2006 (for most states this number of family members had the highest median income) for a random set of states in the U.S. was:

60,298 - 75,775 - 66,711 - 67,897 - 72,591 - 66,095 - 67,560 - 59,663 - 78,413 - 71,559 - which averages between $68-69,000/year.

The current costs of health insurance for the average family appear to be roughly: $12,000/year - as per the data below.

http://www.census.gov/hhes/www/income/medincsizeandstate.html

The Kaiser survey found three out of five employers (60%) offered coverage, down from 69% five years earlier, with most losses in small companies. Among employers with 200 or more workers, 98% offer health coverage.

This year, the average annual premium for family coverage hit $10,880

http://www.usatoday.com/money/industries/health/2005-09-14-family-health-policy_x.htm

(09/14/2005)
----------------------------
The average annual premium for family coverage amounts to $12,106 in 2007

The percentage of people covered by employer-based health insurance fell to 59.7 percent in 2006, down from 60.2 percent in 2005. It was 64.2 percent in 2000.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/09/11/AR2007091100666.html

It is unclear to me how families of four who lack health insurance with incomes in the range of $60,000 - $75,000 (besides the obvious impossibility for lower income people) at the very least could possibly afford to pay most or all of the costs of health insurance costing them $12,000/year, where they don't have health insurance through work or retirement/disability pensions.

It is one thing to talk about "subsidizing" the health insurance needs of "low income people". Unfortunately middle income people will need assistance as well.

It's unclear to me why I, as a retired Federal Employee, should pay roughly $2,400/year for quite good health insurance while others who lack employer coverage or similar should have to pay almost five times as much as we pay for comparable coverage.

I think that some form of Single Payer Health Insurance is the only viable way for us to have a faintly logical health care system. I can imagine employers being taxed - based upon their income or gross receipts or similar. It seems illogical to me to penalize employers by taxing them for each employee that they employee. Obviously if insurance will be "affordable" to employees it will be "unaffordable" to most small employers (who tend not to have health insurance plans today). Current law (and other plans that tax employers by employee) provide an incentive to have "contract workers" rather than "employees" and to avoid adding to one's payroll.

My pet health insurance idea is in an old blog entry of mine from my early blogging days.

I hope that others will push for single payer!

Thanks!